Youth Winter Retreat Reflection (Part 2)

"The kingdom of heaven is like treasure hidden in a field. When a man found it, he hid it again, and then in his joy went and sold all he had and bought that field. Again, the kingdom of heaven is like a merchant looking for fine pearls. When he found one of great value, he went away and sold everything he had and bought it."

Matthew 13:44-46

Often times, we interpret this parable as us looking for the treasure, finding it, and giving everything we have for this treasure. However, Pastor Tony gave us a different perspective of this parable. The field is the people of the world and God is the man who finds the treasure. God went into the world and found treasure. He found us. We are the treasure. You are the treasure. God saw tremendous value in you and he gave His Son, Jesus, in order to gain you. The difference between the parable of the hidden treasure and the pearl is that the treasure is us while the pearl is you. Pastor Tony said that Jesus would have still died for me if I was the only one who needed Him. And this is the love of our Father. It's so extravagant! It's a love that gives up everything. We have tremendous value in God's eyes and how God sees us is reality. His opinion is reality and if he deems us of worth, then we have worth.

Discipleship is following Jesus. He is absolutely worthy to follow. God will not hold back good things from us.

"Very truly I tell you Pharisees, anyone who does not enter the sheep pen by the gate, but climbs in by some other way, is a thief and a robber. The one who enters by the gate is the shepherd of the sheep. The gatekeeper opens the gate for him, and the sheep listen to his voice. He calls his own sheep by name and leads them out. When he has brought out all his own, he goes on ahead of them, and his sheep follow him because they know his voice. But they will never follow a stranger; in fact, they will run away from him because they do not recognize a stranger's voice." - John 10:1-5

How are you going to follow God? You have to hear his voice. You build relationships through conversations. True relationship happens in dialogue. If you know the whole Bible and all the laws, but you don't have a relationship with God, you have almost nothing. Love is about a relationship and we must cultivate this relationship. You cannot force a relationship with God but as you plant a tree, water it, give it sunlight, and wait for it to grow, we can read our Bible, spend time with God everyday, and wait for Him. The relationship will work from ground up. You can't plan the way a tree is going to grow. In the same way, our relationship with God will take its course. Metaphorically, we must expose ourselves to light and water. Each and every one of us are different and we have unique ways to communicate with God. Some people hear God through art, nature, and music. While these are subjective ways to hear God, we need something objective - the Bible. We must know the word of God by reading all of scripture, not just the parts of scripture that we like. And in order to cultivate our relationship with God, there are things we need to cut out in order to hear the word of God (this is probably different for each of us).

Let's cultivate our relationship with God and cultivate attentiveness to God throughout our lives! 

...to be continued

Youth Winter Retreat Reflection (Part I)

As always, it was a blessing to attend the youth group winter retreat. This time it was a bit different being a leader instead of just an attendant. However the main focus was still all about spending time with the Lord and simply enjoying his presence.

Friday night, Pastor Tony's first message was about the God the Father. The message was based on Matthew 13:44-46, the "Parable of Hidden Treasure and the Pearl." The passage was on Matthew 13:44-46, the "Parable of the Hidden Treasure and the Pearl."

Pastor Tony shared the gospel with us and taught that God is the good father. However, he did this by first portraying the false presentations of God.

God is not the

1. Absent father. People who portray God as the absent father have feelings of rejection & abandonment and naturally project this feeling to God. God feels distant & uninvolved in your life.
2. Passive father. A passive father is physically there but not very involved in your life. He doesn't engage in conversation with you. Children with passive fathers have hidden anger, difficulty in getting in touch with their emotions, and difficulty with relationship intimacy.
3. Performance oriented father. A performance oriented father has high standards that are not balanced with love. He points to your flaws and not to your strengths & successes. There is love and affirmation only when performed well. 
4. Authoritarian father. The authoritarian father is strict and lives by the rules. Obedience > relationship.
5. Abusive father. An abusive father seems very angry all the time and his children are constantly walking on egg shells. 

God is not absent, passive, performance-oriented, authoritarian, or abusive. He is the good father who unconditionally pours out love in concrete, tangible ways. He initiates a relationship with you.

Although my parents never demanded high performance from me, growing up, I always wanted to do things perfectly. However, as we all know, that's impossible. And this week, I was reminded that my worth is not determined by my performance. On Wednesday, I had organic chemistry lab and we were doing part one of the two week lab. While we were doing the experiment, I somehow pushed the watch glass and spilled all my precipitate (oh no!). Thank God we were working with solids! I scraped up what I could and continued with my experiment. At this moment I was just really reminded that my worth is not determined by my performance. I cannot base my worth in how I'm doing in school or in other aspects of life. My worth solely comes from God, my good father. And He loves me unconditionally! And he loves you unconditionally too!

...to be continued

Learning

Throughout elementary, middle, and high school, I just had to pay attention to the teacher and do all the homework in order to do well in the class. As long as I did those two (not that it was easy) I knew I was prepared for the tests. However, I learned (very early on) that that's not how college works. College has really changed the way I study and go about doing my work.

Here are the changes:

1. I barely use my agenda book anymore. If you asked me in middle school or high school, I could not have gone through the day without my agenda book. However, college isn't looking at the work that is due only tomorrow. It's about looking at what's due within the next few weeks and knowing when your next exams are. Now I just write everything on my online calendar.
2. Everything is online! This was the biggest change. I know that some schools (especially in other counties) integrate technology within the classrooms, but everything in my high school was done in paper and pen/pencil. I also turn in a lot of my writing assignment online and these mark the exact time when you turn your assignment in. Your professor can see it even if it's one minute late!
3. I began taking notes on my laptop. I think it was the hardest part to get used to; while I do need my laptop to take notes, it takes so much self-control not to go on facebook during class. Since you use your laptop all the time, I would say that choosing the right laptop for your needs is one of the most important decisions you will make for college!
4. I started studying with other people more frequently. Other people know something I don't and I know something they don't. It's really helpful to learn from others. You just have to be careful who you're getting your information from.
5. This semester I began recording lectures on my phone. It really helps to be able to listen to what my professor said again because I have a hard time following what's going on in class in the first place.
6. I try to get as much homework and work done during school. This was really difficult to get used to last semester. I was used to having a set schedule - go to school, come home and do homework, and then repeat. But I have so many gaps and come home pretty late sometimes. I'm still learning to use my time efficiently in school but thank God I can concentrate more in school than in the beginning of last semester.
7. I learned that everyone comes to classes with different backgrounds. Because I have a harder time understanding something doesn't mean I'm incapable of understanding it. It might mean that other people learned about the topic in the past and it just means that I have to work harder to understand it. 
8. It's important to know your resources and to use them. In high school I never really interacted with my teachers. However, at such a large university such as the University of Maryland, it is so beneficial to go to professor's office hours and learn personally from them. I find myself doing much better when I take the initiative to go talk to a professor or the TA.
9. Studying from old tests. This was considered cheating in high school, but it's not in college. It's so so important to know the test style of your professor. Even though you might be taking the same class with your friend, the way you study and what you study may drastically be different. Although professors change the information tested, their style will most likely be the same.
10. Befriend people in class. It's impossible to befriend 200 people, but having at least one or two friends in each class really makes a difference (at least for me). It makes the class more enjoyable. 

Although I'm finding myself adapting new ways to learn and study, I'm so thankful for the foundations I learned in high school. The study habits taught by Mr. Hendley in AP Chem in high school really helped me last semester in Organic Chemistry I when my professor didn't assign any homework. I resorted to taking lecture notes, reading the book and making outlines, and doing book problems (though I started slacking off at the end of the semester). I'm still learning from my mistakes and trying to learn effective ways to study. I find it fascinating learning how the brain stores and retains information.

How you study is also heavily dependent on your major and your coursework, but maybe the basics are similar. Well, this is all from a bio major's perspective who attends 90+ people lectures. 

Do everything without grumbling or arguing

"I've counted up the cost,
Oh, I've counted up the cost,
Yes, I've counted up the cost,
and You are worth it."

I've been listening to this song and I really like the chorus when he sings "I've counted up the cost" (haha, that Irish accent).

Last Wednesday I went to a One U (one of the many Christian groups on campus) meeting and it was really encouraging and refreshing. Although my priorities are with YDJ and I don't know when I will attend another One U meeting, I learned a lot. The members of One U were all full of life and very welcoming! I hope that I can learn to be welcoming to any newcomers in our church.

The passage they were studying on Wednesday was Philippians 2:12-18. I was especially convicted by verse 14 - "Do everything without grumbling or arguing." The leader talked about how as he prepared to speak, he caught many complaints pop up in his head. I thought about myself and I realized that there have been so many complaints that have come out of my mouth or even complaints that have crossed my thoughts. He continued to explain that as Christians, the lives we are living is far better than the life that we deserve to live. Although I am a sinner, Jesus chose to die on the cross for my all my sins because He loves me. As a result, I live fully under God's grace! What is there to complain about when God has poured our His blessings over my life and I'm living a life far, far better than the one I deserve? This really changed my perspective. It's so easy to complain about the school workload, circumstances, the weather, other people, etc and I'm pretty sure I daily complain without realizing that I am complaining. But Paul commands us to "do everything without grumbling or complaining." However, I cannot do this all on my own! I'm learning more and more about the Holy Spirit himself as well as learning to daily depend and trust Him in my life.

By writing this post, I was reminded of the time I wrote about positivity a year and a half ago. As I began getting rid of complaints in my heart and mind this week, I realized what a blessed life I am living right now! Getting rid of complaints made room for thanksgiving and praise. I thank God for this new semester. I know that He is Sovereign and will continue to lead me! One thing I'm especially thankful is that when I went to classes this semester, I knew at least a few people from my classes last semester. It's comforting seeing at least a few familiar faces.

Every time we talk to someone, our conversations can add to their life or our conversations could waste their time. I hope that my conversations can be full of life, encouraging, and positive. Let's consciously make the effort to "do everything without grumbling or arguing."