His Perfect Plans

"'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the Lord, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.'" - Jeremiah 29:11

"The Lord will fulfill his purpose for me; your love, O Lord, endures forever -- do not abandon the works of your hands." - Psalm 138: 8

How many times have I heard that God's plans are perfect, the best? By now, I know in my mind that God's plans are the best. I know that even my best plans are terrible in comparison to what God has in store my future. However, how often do I truly believe with all my heart that God's plans are the best for me?

There are certain things God has placed in my heart for the future, but I forget that it's supposed to be exciting. God's plans are the best for me because he knows me. I have this image of a parent pulling a begrudging child down the street and sometimes, that's me. I forget that God is leading me through all these new experiences and opportunities that I will like. I guess it might be fear and doubt that hinder me from truly believing that God's plans are the best for me. I may not feel adequate enough It's exciting to be in God's presence and will! I want to be excited and hopeful of the future.

Trusting God has been a challenge in determining what college I wanted to attend for the next year. Near the end of junior year and the beginning of senior year, I considered applying to schools out of state. I wanted to make the decision before I started applying to schools because I didn't want to apply to schools I knew I wouldn't go to even if I got accepted (Application fees are expensive!). As I was praying, asking God whether he wanted me to stay in Maryland or go somewhere, people at church would come up to me and say "you're important here" or something along those lines. Then the messages would convict me that I needed to stay here. I was asking God why I needed to stay in Maryland. It's because the presence of God is here in Maryland. I think God really has a lot to teach me through the ministry here in these upcoming years. However, it was a struggle to make the decision to only apply to UMCP & UMBC. All my friends were applying to various colleges, here and there, and here I was applying to two schools. Everyone goes to Maryland you know? I wanted it to be my decision, not because of I had to. Now I know that God wants me to stay here, I'm excited for what he has in store for me this upcoming year! There are endless possibilities of things I could do for the future! (:

Thankful!

Macbeth

The Macbeth video was probably the easiest video project I ever had. Well, I've only done around three video projects in my high school career, but video projects are always so stressful.  I am so thankful for the group I had. We worked really well together and there weren't many hassles. God definitely provided nice weather and a place for us to record. If you want to see our project, you can watch it here below! My favorite scene is the murder of Lady Macduff and Fleance. (:

Important things in any relationship:

I recently realized the importance of communication & honesty in any relationship. A lack of communication between friends will lead to unintended miscommunication, hurt feelings, and eventually a fall out. As well as communication, honesty is extremely important in a relationship. It's the best when you can be completely honest with your friend no matter how you feel. Being honest means you tell them all the good and the bad without being afraid of being judged. It's a sign of trust. When you can be completely honest in a relationship,  freedom reigns! Below is an excerpt I read this morning about honesty:

Can God Take Your Honesty?

You are as close to God as you choose to be. Like any friendship, you must work at developing your friendship with God. It won't happen by accident. It takes desire, time, and energy. If you want a deeper, more intimate connection with God you must learn to honestly share your feelings with him, trust him when he asks you to do something, learn to care about what he cares about, and desire his friendship more than anything else. I must choose to be honest with God. The first building block of a deeper friendship with God is complete honesty — about your faults and your feelings. God doesn't expect you to be perfect, but he does insist on complete honesty. None of God's friends in the Bible were perfect. If perfection was a requirement for friendship with God, we would never be able to be his friends. Fortunately, because of God's grace, Jesus is still the "friend of sinners" [Matthew 11:19]. In the Bible, the friends of God were honest about their feelings, often complaining, second-guessing, accusing, and arguing with their Creator. God, however, didn't seem to be bothered by this frankness; in fact, he encouraged it. God allowed Abraham to question and challenge him over the destruction of the city of Sodom. Abraham pestered God over what it would take to spare the city, negotiating God down from fifty righteous people to only ten. God also listened patiently to David's many accusations of unfairness, betrayal, and abandonment. God did not slay Jeremiah when he claimed that God had tricked him. Job was allowed to vent his bitterness during his ordeal, and in the end, God defended Job for being honest, and he rebuked Job's friends for being inauthentic. God told them, "You haven't been honest either with me or about me — not the way my friend Job has... My friend Job will now pray for you and I will accept his prayer" [Job 42:7–8 MSG]. In one startling example of frank friendship, [Exodus 33:1-17] God honestly expressed his total disgust with Israel's disobedience. He told Moses he would keep his promise to give the Israelites the Promised Land, but he wasn't going one step farther with them in the desert! God was fed up, and he let Moses know exactly how he felt. Moses, speaking as a "friend" of God, responded with equal candor: "'Look, you tell me to lead this people but you don't let me know whom you're going to send with me... If I'm so special to you, let me in on your plans... Don't forget, this is YOUR people, your responsibility... If your presence doesn't take the lead here, call this trip off right now! How else will I know that you're with me in this, with me and your people? Are you traveling with us or not?...' God said to Moses, 'All right. Just as you say; this also I will do, for I know you well and you are special to me'" [Exodus 33:12–17 MSG]. Can God handle that kind of frank, intense honesty from you? Absolutely! Genuine friendship is built on disclosure. What may appear as audacity God views asauthenticity. God listens to the passionate words of his friends; he is bored with predictable, pious clichés. To be God's friend, you must be honest to God, sharing your true feeling, not what you think you ought to feel or say. It is likely that you need to confess some hidden anger and resentment at God for certain areas of your life where you have felt cheated or disappointed. Until we mature enough to understand that God uses everything for good in our lives, we harbor resentment toward God over our appearance, background, unanswered prayers, past hurts, and other things we would change if we were God. People often blame God for hurts caused by others. This creates what William Backus calls "your hidden rift with God." Bitterness is the greatest barrier to friendship with God: Why would I want to be God's friend if he allowed this? The antidote, of course, is to realize that God always acts in your best interest, even when it is painful and you don't understand it. But releasing your resentment and revealing your feeling is the first step to healing. As so many people in the Bible did, tell God exactly how you feel [consider Job (Job 7:17-21), Asaph (Psalm 83:13-18), Jeremiah (Jeremiah 20:7), Naomi (Ruth 1:20)]. To instruct us in candid honesty, God gave us the book of Psalms — a worship manual, full of ranting, raving, doubts, fears, resentments, and deep passions combined with thanksgiving, praise, and statements of faith... When you read the emotional confessions of David and others, realize this is how God wants you to worship him — holding back nothing of what you feel. You can pray like David: "I pour out my complaints before him and tell him all my troubles. For I am overwhelmed" [Psalm 142:2-3a NLT].

Mr. Roosevelt:

Mr. Roosevelt, Eleanor Roosevelt's male pageant, began two years ago. It's hosted by the National Honor Society, which somewhat falls under my responsibilities. Due to complications and a lack of commitment from the contestants, Mr. Roosevelt was canceled this year. At first, I was disappointed in the cancellation of the show because the Social Committee worked so hard. Personally, I had no part in planning for this show. I had no idea what was going on, but still, I was disappointed that an NHS sponsored event was canceled. However as Friday came, I understood why God had allowed the show to not work our in its earlier stages. If the show was still on, we would have had sold 300+ tickets by Friday and we would have been dealing with a lot of money. If you recall, it snowed last Friday, which means the show would have been canceled anyways. Thank God that the show was canceled much earlier and now we only had to refund ten tickets. If it wasn't canceled as it was earlier in the week, we would have had to refund 300+ tickets! Thank God. (:

Grumbling

"Do everything without complaining or arguing, so that you may become blameless and pure, children of God without fault in a crooked and depraved generation, in which you shine like stars in the universe." - Philippians 2:14

"But you were unwilling to go up; you rebelled against the command of the Lord your God. You grumbled in your tents and said, The Lord hates us; so he brought us out of Egypt to deliver us into the hands of the Amorites to destroy us." - Deuteronomy 1:26-27

"Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus." - 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

Grumbling. It seems like wherever I read something recently the word grumbling has been popping out. I noticed more and more how easily complaints slipped out of my mind as I talked with my friends that I thought nothing of it. "We have way too much homework today." "It's too cold." "It's too cold outside." And so on. What contributes to grumbling? I think lack of thanksgiving does. Once I start forgetting all the good things God has given me, I start looking elsewhere and I begin to grumble. In the same way, God's provided everything for the Israelites in the desert - manna, water, fire, and everything they needed but they continued to grumble against God. He even split the Red Sea and they crossed it on dry land. He helped them conquer their enemies when he was with them. And what did the Israelites do? They forgot and grumbled against God. However, this is what I do as well. I forget all the good things that God has done for me and start complaining. I need to look back and thank God for everything he has done and is doing in my life. God is so good! Grumbling doesn't seem like a big deal that I should care so much about it, but there are detrimental consequences of grumbling against God. The Israelites were in the forty years to enter the Canaanite land God promised them, but because they grumbled, they were unable to enter. I think once I start grumbling, it brings a pessimistic mood into a place.

I need to stop complaining and "just do it."

Victory

Korea

After nine years, I'm officially GOING TO KOREA THIS SUMMER! (: I'm really excited even though I have no idea what I'm going to be doing in Korea. I'll be gone for two months and I'll miss a lot of things happening here, but I hope that God will teach me new things while I'm in Korea.

Physics

I'm relieved that the second quarter is finally over. I started the second quarter by failing my physics test and it has been really hard bringing my grade up again throughout the quarter; however God taught me that I need to trust him with everything (once again). God is the God who hears my prayers - "Know that the Lord has set apart the godly for himself; the Lord will hear when I call to him." I find it funny that even though I did  much better on my tests and quizzes after that one test, my grade slowly went up and until the last day of the quarter it was so close to an A. By God's grace I pulled an A this quarter. Woohoo and I learned my lesson. Never will I again neglect to study for a physics test. But through failing that test, God taught me a lot! I'm officially more than halfway through my senior year. This year is flying by!

Weather

Today I have to go work on my Macbeth video project with my group and I was praying that the weather would be really nice and it looks beautiful outside today! God is good. (:

(this was actually written this morning)

God is Sovereign

I haven't posted for more than a week and so these are the things that have been in my mind the last few weeks or so. It's rather long and I could have posted these things separately, but I decided not to. So you could just read the different sections out of order or just not read them at all. (:

Answered Prayers

God is a God who answers prayers. Psalm 84:2 says "My soul yearns, even faints; for the courts of the Lord; my heart and flesh cry out for the living God." Throughout the Bible, God answered the prayers of various people. This morning I read about how desperately Hannah cried out to God for a child. When she prayed to the Lord, Eli, the priest at the temple thought she was drunk!

Eli: How long will you keep getting drunk? Get rid of your wine.

Hannah: Not so, my lord. I am a woman who is deeply troubled. I have not been drinking wine or beer; I was pouring out my soul to the Lord. Do not take your servant for a wicked woman; I have been praying here out of my great anguish and grief.

Eli: Go in peace, and my the God of Israel grant you what you asked of him.

(1 Samuel 1)

God remembered Hannah and graciously granted her not only one child, but five more after Samuel. How great is our God? In the same way, God answers our prayers when we cry out to him. However God works in ways that I don't expect him to. The next two examples are simple prayers that God answered in my life.

One prayer topic that I had for my birthday was that I would feel loved. It's kind of a really broad prayer topic. I would say God answered this prayer topic but in a way that I did not expect. I don't recall seriously getting sick last year until December when I got sick twice within a week. The flu this season is not what you want to mess with! So I got sick on my birthday, but I would say I did feel loved. My friend bought me an ice cream cake to school. The sad part was that it started melting, which is what ice cream does. Even though being sick was exhausting and painful, God showed me his love through my family who constantly took care of me while I was sick. When I couldn't do anything but lie in bed, my mom would bring me food and my dad would bring me medicine. My sister would mostly do whatever I asked her to do. 

This week I sold chocolate for a Latin Honor Society fundraiser. The first few days, I did pretty well, selling around 25 chocolate bars out of 60. However I had trouble selling chocolate as the days went by. I would ask people, but nobody would be willing to buy any chocolate. On Friday I had around 20 chocolate bars left in which most were peanut butter (which not many people liked) and so I didn't think I could sell out. But in the back of my mind, I was "God, can I sell my whole box today?" Then throughout the day, people would come up to me and ask me to buy chocolate. Before I couldn't even sell any when I went up to people, but now people were coming to me! I didn't think much of the small prayer I made to God. When I almost sold out at the end of the day, I was wondering why I sold so many boxes and I realized that God answered my small prayer. God is good all the time. (:

Looking back at the ways God answered my small prayers, it encourages me to cry out to God because he does listen to my prayers. He listens to your prayers too. I want to be able to cry out to God for other people. 

In and Out of Season

"Preach the Word; be prepared in season and out of season; correct, rebuke and encourage-with great patience and careful instruction" (2 Timothy 4:2).

Last week I had Bible study on 2 Timothy 4: 1-22 and the verse that really caught my attention was verse 2, which was also the key verse of the Bible study. Then what really caught my attention within the verse of the phrase "be prepared in season and out of season." At the YDJ retreat, one of my friends encouraged me by reminding me that everything I'm doing now is for the future. I had to think about that for a while. Am I actually doing my best in everything with the attitude that what I do matters? Then I realized that I kind of lost sight of that mentality over the years in high school. During freshman year, I was determined to do my best in everything I did no matter how small something was. During sophomore year, I was so hopeful of the future and all that God had in store for me. I think that year God awakened my heart to certain plans he has for my future. However in junior year, all I wanted to do was get work done and I was just constantly working. I hope to think that I did my work well, but it was more important that it was done. Then senior year came and now if I know a teacher's not really going to read it, I haven't put much effort in it, which is not so good. As a result, I began to lose sight of the promises God had given me throughout middle school and high school, which is why I chose Psalm 138:8 as my key verse. I need to be prepared in season and out of season to be able to reach out to others which requires reading the Bible and praying daily. There are certain seasons in life where God gives us the opportunity to meet people and minister to them, but I believe before that, there must be a season where we really dig deep into the Bible and grow. If we ourselves don't have the word of God, how will we share with others? I want to be prepared in season and out of season so that I will be ready when God gives me opportunities.

What Pleases the Lord

"For you were once darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Live as children of light (for the fruit of the light consists in all goodness, righteousness and truth) and find out what pleases the Lord" (Ephesian 5:10)

After I read this verse a few days ago, the phrase "and find out what pleases the Lord" has been echoing through my head.

Now

"'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the Lord, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you.'" (Jeremiah 29:11-14).

Aug gave a message on these verses last Sunday with a twist. God's words are true throughout history and so, this verse remains true yesterday, today, and tomorrow. Therefore, if I declared this verse five years ago, I would be saying that God has a plan for my life in the future, which is now. Thus, God has a plan for my life now. I hope I can seek God's plan for me now and do my best to do follow them.

Korea

"Now listen, you who say, 'Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business and make money.' Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes. Instead, you ought to say, 'If it is the Lord's will, we will live and do this or that.'" (James 4:13-15).

If it is God's will, I will go to Korea over the summer. If it isn't, I know there will be a reason and he will provide things for me to do over the summer.

twenty thirteen

Looking back at 2012, it divides into three distinctive sections in my head:

1. Second half of junior year
2. Summer
3. First half of senior year

(I guess I like lists a lot. I've been using them a lot, haha)

I am so thankful for this past year because I learned and experienced so much. I cannot recall everything that I did, but when I look back at my blog I know that 2012 was a good year. I'm thankful for all the time I had with my friends and all those talks we had because they were so encouraging. I am so thankful for the new photographic opportunities I had throughout the year. It was my first year having my DLSR and I learned so much from having it! I learned more about portrait photography and I have so much more to learn, but I know that God will be with me throughout the whole process. I know that senior year is a peaceful year and I kept saying that it was foggy, but I think the fog's going to lift now that the new year's going to begin.

I chose Psalm 138:8 as my key verse this year. It actually seems really random because it's not one of the famous Bible verse, but it says "The Lord will fulfill his purpose for me; your love, O Lord, endures forever -- do not abandon the works of your hands." I think it's important for me to hold onto God's purposes for my life. When I look back, I was so set on the things God set in my heart sophomore year, but then as I reached senior year, they started slipped. Maybe that's why everything seemed foggy and uncertain the latter half of last year. This year I want to hold onto what God has spoken over me and the purposes he has for my life.

I love Isaiah 43:18-19 (see previous post).

I am so thankful that our God is the God who continues to do new things. If he didn't, everything would be mundane and traditional. I know that this new year is going to be full of new and exciting things. Graduating high school, going off to college, and making new friends, but I hope that I can make an impact in the lives of the people I am surrounded by even while I am in high school.

Back to the routine tomorrow! No matter what happens, I know that I have to trust God. If I don't, then everything comes crumbling down. But if I do trust him, "I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength." (:

This year's going to be exciting!

Overdue family picture with the new tripod!