Blessed

Yesterday I turned 19 and I felt very blessed! Living under God's grace is amazing and full of blessings. And I did nothing to deserve all the good things God has showered over my life.

I'm so thankful to have spent my afternoon with Hannah. We went through our usual routine - going to Target, Jo-Ann's, Marshalls, and then eating (can't end a hangout with eating!). No matter what we do, it's always refreshing spending time with her! I'm realizing more and more how much I love spending quality time with people.

Then we had these guys over for dinner. 

 And we might have a slight obsession over Frozen. 

Multiply

"All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always ,to the very end of the age." 

- Matthew 28:17-20

I listened to these videos a few weeks ago (maybe a little more than a week ago). This following video has especially been on my mind for the past week. I think this year has been a year of change, not just because I started college, but there has been a change in the dynamics of people at church. God has lead people in our church to all kinds of different places this year. I was recently thinking about this and thought it was kind of sad. But then, this video really convicted me. As a church, we're supposed to multiply so others may come to know God! By going all over the world, God's going to do great things through us. As a result, I am so thankful for the time I have now. You never know when God's going to call us to go somewhere in the future.

20 Thanksgiving Topics

The other day, I told my sister we should come up with twenty Thanksgiving topics and put it on our blogs. She already wrote hers so you can read her Thanksgiving topics here.

Here are my Thanksgiving topics: I am thankful for...

1. Jesus dying on the cross for my sins that I may live before God. He is the zealous lover who pursues us no matter what. This is so assuring. It was God who initiated this relationship and is in control.
2. Our church family. Over and over again, I am amazed by how people love one another in our church. Despite their extremely busy schedule and lives, they make themselves available. If you ever need help in anything - tutoring, a ride, etc., there is always someone who is willing to help you.
3. The opportunity to go to attend college. I realized this year that it is such a privilege to go to college. Since most of my peers end up going to college, it seems like the norm, but compared to the rest of the world, it's not. I'm so thankful for the great opportunities to be found in and through the University of Maryland!
4. Related to the previous one, I am thankful for my parents for supporting me through college. More than this, I'm thankful that they have supported my interests throughout my life. They have sacrificed their time and money so that I could have piano and violin lessons for years. They also bought me DSLR almost two years ago. (:
5. For my best friend Hannah. I'm thankful for this friendship God has given me. We used to be so different ten years ago that no one would have guessed that we would become friends. 
6. Tea & hot chocolate on cold, rainy or snowy days.
7. YDJ. Through the discussions and lectures each Friday, I've been learning more and more of what it means to be a Christian and in aspects I have never thought about before.
8. The Holy Spirit who guided me throughout high school and still continues to guide me. Most of this semester, my prayer request was that the Holy Spirit would just guide me because I didn't know where He would lead me. I can't believe the semester is almost over! I thank God for providing such a great schedule with great professors this semester because I had no idea what I was doing when I was making my schedule at orientation. God also provided a pretty early day to schedule my classes so that when I scheduled, I had a lot of options (so thankful for AP classes).
9. My two months spent in Korea. I think my trip to Korea has opened my eyes to the cultural differences between Koreans and Americans. Then the question of - where do I fit in between by being Korean American? I believe the trip had a great impact on my life much more than I give it credit.
10. My Asian American studies class, which has taught me more about the difficulties and struggles early Asian immigrants faced. I never knew that Asians suffered so much! I knew there was racism back then, but I didn't know the extent of the hatred they faced. Now I'm really interested in the futures of first, second, and third generation of Asian Americans. 
11. My biology study group! God knew that I needed a study group and he provided me one.
12. Rides to school. I'm thankful that I get a ride to school half of the week from my dad when he's not working, which means I can sleep a little bit more (or stay up a little bit more). I've also had rides from various people (my Korean neighbor, James, msy. Abraham), which I am grateful for! 
13. The libraries at Maryland - Hornbake and Chemistry are my two favorite right now. I also really like CSPAC but it's just so far away from everything.
14. For my Bible study teacher, msy. Susanna Bae, who is always faithful and flexible with her time. I've been studying the Bible with her since freshman year of high school. Even though she had Josephine and Joanna (and now Jeremiah) and was busy as a mother, she continued to study the Bible with me! We haven't had Bible study for the past month or so after she gave birth to Jeremiah, and I realized how important the Bible studies were in my life. As Christians, we must be rooted in God's word and really study his word. The other day I was trying to explain certain parts of the Bible to my friend and I realized how difficult it must be to teach the Bible. It really revealed to me that receiving and teaching the Bible can only be done by the guidance of the Holy Spirit.
15. Quality times spent with others! This morning a group of us went to Georgetown for Black Friday shopping and although there weren't major sales in Georgetown, I really enjoyed just spending time with them. 
16. Mothers & their prayers. They're so genuine & sincere.
17. All of you bloggers. I enjoy reading your posts and they encourage me to look towards God and praise him for all of His good works!
18. My lovely sister who never fails to entertain me. She's so artistic and talented that I'm excited for how God's going to lead her through all of her talents.
19. Now. I'm thankful for this time God has given me in this season of life. So many things can change in a year. People I see now might be on the other side of the world in another year. Therefore I am so thankful for the relationships God has placed in my life now.
20. My license! I'm thankful that I was able to drive during my senior to school when I needed to stay after school. (:

Wait, one more. I'm thankful that I was able to volunteer at the School of Public Health this past semester on Saturday mornings! It was really fun just playing with Delia and here is a video I made for the clinic. You can see pictures of the kids and some of the things they did.

What are you thankful for?

remain in me

 This is Delia, the child I'm responsible for on Saturday mornings. She has three cute younger brothers who also come on Saturdays. She has so much energy that I spend most of the two hours chasing her around. I really enjoyed volunteering at the clinic and I can't believe next Saturday is the last one for the semester.

2013 is an interesting year.

Stewardship

In YDJ, we have been studying different aspects on what it means to be a Christian.
Last Friday, Abe lead the meeting on the topic of stewardship, a word we don't use often.

A steward knows the master's will, who he or she is, never misses an opportunity, and is faithful.

After our group discussions, we established 4 principles of stewardship.

1. God is the owner and he owns everything. Therefore we are stewards to what belongs to God, which includes our talents, time, and money.
2. Responsibility to do the owner's will.
3. Accountability. What are we doing with the time given to us? We are accountable to God.
4. Reward. There is an eternal reward. 

As I was learning this, a great relief washed over me as I realized that I am not the owner. I don't have to worry about making things go according to my plans because God is sovereign. He's the owner. I also realized that I've been viewing school more of a burden rather than something I enjoyed. I realized that I can have two different approaches to what God has given me. I can accept them as burdens, a laundry list of things that need to get done. Or I can enjoy it. God doesn't have big plans for my life to watch me struggle on my own. He's going to be with me every single step of the way. Instead of focusing on getting every step of the way perfect, God has been teaching me to rely on him. I don't know where He's going to lead me in one year, five years, or twenty years, but I am certain He has the best plans for my life. He's full of grace and mercy. Last Thursday, so many things were going wrong one after another. I was feeling sick and couldn't think clearly, but you know, God was full of grace.

"Yet we urge you, brothers and sisters, to do so more and more and to make it your ambition to lead a quiet life: You should mind your own business and work with your hands, just as we told you, so that your daily life may win the respect of outsiders and so that you will not be dependent on anybody."
-1 Thessalonians 4:10b-12

"The Lord gives strength to his people; the Lord blessed his people with peace." 

- Psalm 29:11

"Now may the God of peace, who through the blood of the eternal covenant brought back from the dead our Lord Jesus, that great shepherd of the sheep, equip you with everything good for doing his will, and may he work in us what is pleasing to him, through Jesus Christ, to whom be glory forever and ever. Amen."

- Hebrews 13:20 

Coram Deo

"What Does 'Coram Deo' Mean?" (read the full article by clicking on it!)

"To live coram Deo is to live one’s entire life in the presence of God, under the authority of God, to the glory of God...

     The Christian who compartmentalizes his or her life into two sections of the religious and the nonreligious has failed to rasp the big idea. The big idea is that all of life is religious or none of life is religious. To divide life between the religious and the nonreligious is itself a sacrilege.

     This means that if a person fulfills his or her vocation as a steelmaker, attorney, or homemaker coram Deo, then that person is acting every bit as religiously as a soul-winning evangelist who fulfills his vocation. It means that David was as religious when he obeyed God's call to be a shepherd as he was when he was anointed with the special grace of kingship. It means that Jesus was every bit as religious when He worked in His father's carpenter shop as He was in the Garden of Gethsemane. 

     Integrity is found where men and women live their lives in a pattern of consistency. It is a pattern that functions the same basic way in church and out of church. It is a life that is open before God. It is a life in which all that is done is done as to the Lord. It is a life lived by principle, not expediency; by humility before God, not defiance. It is a life lived under the tutelage of conscience that is held captive by the Word of God."

I read this article two weeks ago and it's been floating in the back of my mind. The part that stuck out to me the most was "David was as religious when he obeyed God's call to be a shepherd at he as when he was anointed with the special grace of kingship." Whether we feel like we're doing big things or God or living through the daily, mundane routines of life, we are living for God. I pray that God may be glorified through my studies although everything is so uncertain at this moment. College is hard. But God will bring me through. All I can do is come before God and ask him to lead me because I just don't know how to approach some assignments. Also some things are just so hard that I can't do it on my own. 

"Do not boast about tomorrow, for you do not know what a day may bring." - Proverbs 27:1

This verse is so good! Although I may not consciously acknowledge it, there's a plan on the back of my mind on how my life is supposed to be like. I realized that I really don't know about five, ten, or twenty years from now, but I have plans on how tomorrow, next week, or this semester is supposed to be like. However, all I can do is bring it all down to God and let him lead me. He has the best plans for me!

For example, after my first biology test I knew that I needed to be in a study group. And of course God knew this too! Somehow I got involved in a formation of a study group and it has been so helpful in preparing for the next test. Thank God! I have my bio test in two hours...

Grace

God recently reminded me of a small prayer topic I had two years ago. Well, it was something that I thought was something small, but looking back, God taught me so much through this simple question I had for him.

Flashback to two years ago:
I knew my name was Grace and I knew that God's grace was important, but I didn't really understand what it meant. There's the famous song "Amazing Grace," written about God's amazing grace. I heard of people talk about God's grace throughout my life. Despite all this, I didn't really understand what grace meant or what having grace meant.

From then on, God began to teach me about His heart and His grace for people. As I began to accept His grace over my life, I learned (I'm still learning) to show grace to people. Showing grace is accepting people despite their weaknesses and faults. It's continuing to love despite how difficult it is. Receiving grace is getting what I don't deserve at all. God is full of grace. God knows all my faults, mistakes, and weaknesses. Yet, he welcomes me into his presence. Despite my impurities, He loves me.

Today I finished writing up a homework assignment I have been working on for a very long time on Microsoft Word. For some reason, the document itself wasn't saving although I kept pressing "save as" and gave it several different names. I even opened up a new document and copied and pasted the document on it. After several attempts, I assumed that at least one copy should have been saved. So I closed all the documents and pressed "don't save" for all the documents. (You can probably sense where this story is going.) Then I opened the document and...realized it only saved the a copy I had of it from yesterday. I couldn't even open a file from "recently saved" because for some reason it didn't save! In that moment, I asked God, "God please show me grace." Then I remembered I had just copied the whole document using command + C. So I opened another Word document and pressed command + V. Then what I had been working on for a few hours came up. Phew. Thank God!

And God keeps showing His grace over my life.

Here

I am exactly where God wants me to be.

God has been reassuring me this past week that He placed me where I am at this time for a reason. Sometimes in the midst of difficulties, I forget that God wants the best for me. He doesn't give me everything that I want because it isn't the best for me at this time. In times of difficulties and discomforts, I question if I am supposed to be where I am. Yet, again and again, God keeps blessing me without me doing anything. And this is His Grace over my life. It has nothing to do with what I do, but it has everything to do with what He does. I did nothing that made me deserve to be saved by God.

"For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God— not by works, so that no one can boast." - Ephesians 2:8-9

One thing that was difficult for me adjusting to college was the realization that I cannot spend as much time with my friends as I wanted to. I randomly see a lot of people throughout my day, but unless I make the conscious effort to meet up with them, it's hard to really spend time with them. I also think I had a hard time just being alone, but now it's like the norm. Through this, God has been teaching me to just lean on Him. He's all that I need. Everyone has their own schedules and businesses to get through. The only one who can help me in all circumstances is God. The past month, I've been just clueless, trying to figure out a lot of things in college - how to study, how to manage my classes, finding time to relax, etc. When I was clueless, all I could do was to cry out to God, knowing that He heard my prayers.

And He did hear my prayers! God is Sovereign and so faithful.

"The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing." - Psalm 23:1

As Jesus, our shepherd, we lack nothing. No strength, wisdom, or knowledge. In Him, we can find our strength, wisdom, knowledge, etc.

"In Your presence I lack nothing, 

You're all I want and you are here with me."

(The NIV 2011 version reminds me of "Taste and See")

Break Every Chain

We've been studying the book of John for the past month of Sunday Worship Services and wow, it's so good!

"When Jesus spoke again to the people, he said, "I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of light." - John 8:12

"To the Jews who had believed him, Jesus said, 'If you hold to my teaching, you are really my disciples. Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.'" - John 8:31

Later on, Jesus says "I am the way, the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me" (John 14:6).

Listening to these verses just sounds really good. These are verses that I've heard countless number of times while growing up. Of course, Jesus is the light of the world! And of course the truth will set me free. But then I thought about it. What do I need to be set free from? When Jesus died on the cross for my sins, he took care of it all, but God has been revealing to me that there are things that I subconsciously was holding onto. For my gems100 class, we watched this Ted Talk on false memory and it really reveals how the enemy can implant lies in you! The line that caught my attention from the talk was when she said that your memory is like Wikipedia. You can go back and change it and others can go back and change it as well. It's really interesting if you want to listen to it.

God is continually changing me, but there's a part of me that holds onto who I was before. I realized that by holding onto these lies, it prevents me from being able to see who I am now and who God is making me to be. I didn't realize how much of my past mentality affects my actions today, but I think it really does. For example, I just have this mentality that I am really shy and timid, but that was how I used to be, not who I am now. And this really does affect the way I approach people or greet someone new. Jesus said "the truth will set you free" and by truth, meaning himself. Jesus has the power to break all these holds the enemy has over us!

Sometimes I think that if it's God's will, God will easily just hand it to you. But then, this is not true. I'm learning that even if it's God's will, he wants us to work hard for it because by working hard for it, we will learn to value what he has given us. Although this is only the beginning of a long journey of school, I am trying to work really hard. But I need to lean on Him because I cannot do this on my own! I pray that this will all be for God's glory.

In YDJ we are covering different topics each week with the theme "What does a Christian look like?". Two weeks ago, Fred led the discussion on the Holy Spirit and I learned that the Holy Spirit is a person. I want to have a deeper relationship with the Holy Spirit because through His power, Jesus rose from the dead! How amazing is that? We have the same Holy Spirit that raised Jesus from the dead living in us. This perspective changes everything. 

Maryland

Everything

College started two weeks ago and I'm still getting used to everything. I've been meaning to take my camera to school to take pictures around the campus, but I keep forgetting to bring it to school!

Since I don't know much about what's on campus or how to study in college, I've just been asking God to lead me. All I can do is rely on him because with God, the impossibles become possible! Honestly, I really want to do well on my first semester at Maryland. However it's easy to start relying on myself for knowledge and the mentality that hard work is the answer to hard classes. But I realized this past week that God has been with me throughout it all and that is how I am here. Not because of my own knowledge of wisdom, but because of God's wisdom and knowledge. Sometimes it's easy to add to Jesus' power. "Jesus helped me, but..." There's no but. It was all God. And so I pray that I can continue to rely on Jesus for knowledge, wisdom, and strength because he created all things and knows everything! Sometimes it seems too much to give up a little bit of sleep to spend time with God.

As an excerpt from the devotional book Jesus Calling says:

"Spending time alone with Me can be a difficult discipline because it goes against the activity addiction of this age. You may appear to be doing nothing, but actually you are participating in battles going on within spiritual realms. You are waging war- not with the weapons of the world, but with heavenly weapons, which have divine power to demolish strongholds. Living close to Me is a sure defense against evil."

Jesus' disciples often found Jesus praying at the Mount of Olives really early in the morning. With eternity in focus, giving up a little bit of my time in the morning isn't really a sacrifice. It equips me to battle throughout the day.

This is a really good message that my friend H recommended me to watch. It's 54 minutes long, but I assure you it will be worth your time!

We sang this at praise night last Saturday and the chorus has been repeating in my head.

Everything

All I am and all I have to bring

I will give to You my everything

Everything. Can I really give Him my everything?

I just finished reading "Anything the prayer that unlocked my God and my Soul" by Jennie Allen. Jennie Allen writes about the process her family went through as they prayed God to do "anything" with their lives. They obeyed God as He asked them to do certain things or to give up certain things. Eventually they adopted a boy from Rwanda! Can I really ask God to do anything with my life? It's not going to be an easy life but it's going to be so soo beautiful! 

Here is a little excerpts that caught my attention.

"He [God] gave me a vision that our generation would start giving him away rather than just learning about him. He wanted me to call and then equip women who already know and love God to gather friends, coworkers, neighors, and others into conversations- experiences centered on God. God was calling all of us who were spoiled with so much truth to live that truth and to give it away to those who may not have ever attended church or a more traditional Bible study."

This life is so temporary. Living in the mindset of eternity changes everything. It changes my attitude and the decisions that I make.

It changes everything.

I want to see God to amazing things but He calls me to risk all that I am holding onto. When we take risks, God shows up.

Pets

Yesterday was my first day of classes at the University of Maryland!

My first class was oral communications and we had to go around and introduce ourselves describing our past, present, and future. I was pleasantly surprised when almost every single person in our class had a dog or a cat (but most had dogs). I never thought our family would get a pet, but once we adopted Luna from the Greenbelt Animal Shelter, I suppose my outlook on having pets have changed. But as soon as we adopted Luna, I wondered, why do people have pets? The very first week we had Luna, she caught a cold. She kept sneezing, her eyes were infected, and she just looked so miserable. We took her to the vet and I realized that it takes a lot of effort and money to have pets. It's like having a baby, except it's a cat. We have to feed, bathe, and clean after Luna (not that I personally do these things...). So why do people like having pets? People don't need pets. I realized that people really love their pets and they have dogs/cats/etc because they want to. There's a limit to the love pets can return to their owners. Then it made me realize that God doesn't need us either. He doesn't love us because he needs us to love him back. Instead, He just delights in us! It's not that we can offer him something that he lacks. It's so good to just bask in His love. (:

I really like the lyrics to "Help Me Find It" by Sidewalk Prophets

"I don’t know where to go from here
It all used to seem so clear
I’m finding I can’t do this on my own...

I will trust in You

You've never failed before

If there’s a road I should walk

Help me find it"

It describes how I feel in this season of life. It's freshman year and although I know my final destination, I don't know where to go from here. I don't really know what I'm doing, but I suppose it's a learning process. All I can do is trust God. I have been just asking God to lead me because only He knows the best for me.

greater things have yet to come

I graduated from the youth group today! It's such a strange feeling graduating. I'm glad to have graduated, yet there's a part in me that wants to hold onto staying where it is comfortable. It's been six years of Saturday meetings at 10 AM, and two years of praise team practices at 8 AM on Saturday and Sundays. However, now it is time to move on! I really like this quote by C.S. Lewis: "There are far, far better things ahead than any we leave behind." Although I don't know in what context C.S. Lewis wrote this, it's a great assurance that there are greater things ahead! I read the Great Divorce by C.S. Lewis this summer. It was really confusing at first, but as I read on, the encounters the ghost has with other ghosts really intrigued me. The basic plot of the story line is that there is a bus full of ghosts that goes from one world to another world. However after the bus arrives in the other world, each ghost has to make the decision to stay (and get a chance to become a solid being) or return to their previous world where they remain as ghosts. Each of the ghosts has this opportunity to choose to live for eternity! Yet, one by one, the ghosts come up with excuses to return to their depressing world because they are still holding onto something. If you compare what they can obtain (eternal life) versus what they are holding onto, it's really sad.  However there was this one ghost who gave everything up to become solid again, and then his life was just so beautiful after! I think it's hard for me to embrace new opportunities when I'm comfortable where I am. However, I don't want to be holding onto something of the past that will prevent me from moving forward as these ghosts lost this opportunity for eternal life. The future seems so uncertain right now, but I know that if I lay everything down before God and wholeheartedly follow Him, he will make my story beautiful as well. I am learning that instead of worrying about what I will do in the future, all I have to do now is to say "yes" to the things God has in store for me right now.

High school friends! From 2013 to 2017 (that is, if we all graduate in 4 years).

The gift from the senior banquet...ready to be a terp! (:

The Undoing

God is continually undoing these layers inside of me.

Spending Korea for seven weeks was a great experience, but honestly, it was tough. God was constantly undoing these unclean layers, cleansing me of the impurities from these compromises that I made during the last few months of senior year. He was pruning me and still is. As graduation neared, I was always doing something (mostly hanging out with my friends) that I did not spend much time with God. However when I first arrived in Korea, I had hours and hours to myself. Without any friends to talk to during the day since I could only contact people in the morning or at night, I spent a lot of time alone or with adults. I had a lot of time to think and ponder on things as I read a few books. They were sweet seven weeks and I think it helped me come to a few conclusions that I needed to before I begin college.

After visiting Korea, I was so thankful that God brought my family to Maryland when I was in third grade! I see that God's plan for my life was the best. I have great friends and a loving community here!

The last school year was a peaceful year, not because I wasn't busy, but because God continually gave me peace throughout the year! Looking back, it was also a year of undoing (although I'm sure this doesn't end until we meet God for eternity). God was undoing things in me even when I thought I didn't need to be undone. Sometimes I got stuck in a place of complacency or maybe pride that I thought I was okay; I thought I didn't need to be undone. But each year, God continues to reveal more of himself to me. He expands my vision and views that I can no longer settle for what I had settled for the previous year. Before he can reveal himself to me, I must be ready to receive what he is willing to show me. And so, he keeps undoing these layers inside of me.

Reflecting on the summer, I think God is challenging me to live without compromises this upcoming school year (freshman year!). God hates it when we stay lukewarm. In Revelations, God warns us that we will be spit out if we are lukewarm. I believe it's also a call to purity. Usually we associate "purity" to abstinence in a relationship, but it goes further than that. It's a calling to be set apart for God because we were called to live for more.

Luna

If you asked me a few months ago what kind of pet I would want to have, I would have probably said "fish" or something along those lines. Growing up, I used to be really afraid of dogs for some reason. So I never thought our family would ever get a pet, especially a kitten. But my sister has been persistently asking for a cat for months now and last Saturday, they went to the Greenbelt Animal Shelter and adopted Luna!

Conversation with Korean missionaries:

M: What's her name?

R: Luna

M: NOONA?

R: LUNA

M: NOONA?

R: LUNA

M: Luna

Here's a (paraphrased) conversation that reminded me what a great father we have in God:

R: Dreams do come true when you have a good dad.

H: Well I have God as my father!

Yes, we have a good father - on earth and in heaven and he loves to give us good gifts! In the midst of everything, I forget that I have such a good father who wants to give me the best. When my prayers are not answered, it's because he knows the best for me.

I have a lot to learn about cats...

Simple Lessons

These are the simple basic lessons I learned from Bible studies while I was in Korea. I meant to write about them a while ago, but I kept pushing it back. 

• We need to value our inheritance. Growing up, UBF history was never really interesting to me so I never really paid attention whenever we had a lecture on UBF history. However, I learned the importance of valuing our inheritance. In Genesis, God gave Isaac twin sons, Esau and Jacob. Although Esau should have valued his birthright, he sold it to Jacob for "some bread and some lentil stew" (Genesis 25:34a). "So Esau despised his birthright" (Genesis 25:34b). Because Esau did not recognize the value of his birthright, he lost it. In the same way as a second gen in UBF, I have an inheritance. I can learn the values that our church was founded upon or I can choose to ignore it. There is wisdom I can learn from my parents and elders in the church that they had to experience to learn. I also had the opportunity to visit the grave site of American missionaries to Korea. God had so much grace and mercy to Korea that he chose a nation torn apart by war and poverty and brought it up to the Korea we know today.
• There is beauty in serving. "Do not forget to entertain strangers, for by so doing some people have entertained angels without knowing it" (Hebrews 13:2). Being away from home taught me the importance of hospitality. I knew welcoming people was important, but after receiving so much love and hospitality in Korea, I personally learned the importance of welcoming others. It's special being able to make someone feel comfortable. I know it takes effort to begin the conversation with another stranger, but God is still teaching me. In the Bible, Abraham had great hospitality that he entertained angels without knowing it! How amazing is that?
• Be humble in prayer. "Two men went up to the temple and pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. The Pharisee stood by himself and prayed: 'God, I thank you that I am not like other people - robbers,  evildoers, adulterers - or even like this tax collector. I fast twice a week and give a tenth of all I get.' But the tax collector stood at a distance. He would not even look up to heaven, but beat his breast and said, 'God, have mercy on me, a sinner.' I tell you that this man, rather than the other, went home justified before God. For all those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted" (Luke 10:14).
• Have faith like a child. I was taking a walk with a few adults from the church and their kids. There was this one three year old boy that was amazed by everything. It reminded me of the attitude I should have. He saw and ant and was so amazed. "WOWWWW GAE-MEE (ant)." He also kept asking what things were which were followed by "WOW TREES. WOW FLOWERS." As we grow up, we forget how awesome God's creations are!
• Nothing equals spending time with God through reading the Bible and praying. 
• It's about saying "yes" to God. I don't know what I'm going to do in a year, five years, or ten years, but I know where I am going. This year, I've had this image of God holding my hand and just leading me. I've just been following him and it's really interesting where he's taking me.
• There is no condemnation in Jesus. We were studying the Samaritan woman at the Sungdong UBF Summer Bible Conference and as I wrote the testimony, I realized that Jesus did not condemn the Samaritan woman for having so many failed marriages. Instead of condemning her, he forgave her and wanted her to leave her life of sin. I observed how the shepherds in Korea, instead of condemning students for their wrongdoings, were so forgiving and open. Instead of pointing out their faults, they lead the students to Jesus. It's so beautiful!

Home!

I am so excited to be back home in America. Last week I attended the Sungdong UBF's Summer Bible Conference. Then it was the struggle to pack all my luggage as I realized I accumulated more and more things as I stayed in Korea. I think I brought more than 150 pounds of things. Although it was great being able to go to Korea for seven weeks, I am sooo glad to be back home. Somehow America feels more like home. I just feel more free here!

Two of my prayer topics before coming to America was to adjust well to the time differences and not to get sick during the whole process of going to the Summer Bible Conference there, packing, traveling, and then going to the International Summer Bible Conference here just after two days. God is good! When I went to Korea, I had a hard time adjusting to the time differences and I think it took me about a week to get over the jetlag. The first two days, I took a nap from two to eight pm or something similar to that. However when I came to America, I didn't take a nap the whole first day! I believe God is helping me really adjust to the time differences. Praise God!

I also drove for the first time after a while yesterday. It felt really weird at first but now it feels normal.

After a while, I started thinking in Korean. Since in the Korean culture you say "an-young-hae-sae-yo" and bow every time you greet an older person, I automatically keep bowing when I greet people. Also whenever I couldn't understand someone and said "neh," which mean "yes" in Korean, people would automatically repeat themselves. Actually I said "neh" a lot and I keep saying it here now too...

Busan

On Monday and Tuesday I traveled to Busan with Yejee. On Monday we went to the Haeundae beach and on Tuesday, we toured Busan. It was really pretty!

Week Five!

I came back to Seoul last Sunday and I've spent most of the weekdays at the center.

On Monday I spent time with my cousins Hye-jin and Dong-in. Our plans got cancelled because of the heavy rain, so we went all the way to the end of one metro line and ate chicken galbi. Then we went all the way back and watched a Korean movie. It took an hour and a half each way!

On Tuesday I met up with Sarah and Sam at my center and we went to the Children's Grand Park with the pastor's wife. (Her name is Esther Lee and missionary Esther was her Bible student a long time ago.)

On Wednesday I went to Dongdaemoon with two people from the center and bought a bunch of pens. Then I got a call from Sarah, saying her plans got cancelled for the day. So Sarah, Sam, and I met up at Dongdaemoon and went to the Jeong's house! We've been to the their house so many times and each time, they are so welcoming!

On Thursday, I got contacts. It's taking time to adjust and I realized I don't mind wearing my glasses.

One word to summarize Friday would be ping-pong.

On Saturday I watched "Pacific Rim" with a family at the center and went biking at the Han River! I thank God that whenever we were biking, God stopped the rain.

Last week and early this week, I listened to some of the Grace Retreat messages and this quote kept repeating in my head. "It’s an unknown fact, Pheoby, you got tuh go there tuh know there." This is a quote from Their Eyes Were Watching God when the main character, Janie tells her best friend Pheoby that listening to other's experiences is not enough. You have to go there and experience it yourself. In the same way, I don't want to just listen to other's testimonies about what God has done in their lives. I love listening how God works in other people's lives, but I want to experience God myself. Therefore I don't want to be content in hearing how God works in other people's lives and I hope it is the same for you! I was thinking about how in poverty-stricken areas, we can see God heal and do crazy miracles. Yet, it is hard to see the same kind of miracles in the United States? Why is that? I believe we get content with all these other things in our lives. It is extremely important to hunger for God. I realized that lately I haven't been hungry for God. Consequently, I am giving the enemy ground in places he shouldn't be. God offers us his daily bread every day, but it is our choice whether to take it from him or not. The enemy lies and tries to convince me that there are other things more important, things that I should worry about when really, all I have to do is trust God's sovereignty. 

Two more weeks in Korea! Tomorrow I'm going to Busan with Yejee for two days. (:

(Sorry, no pictures this week. I haven't been carrying my camera around because of the rain and I realized how much lighter my bag is without my camera, haha.)

Leave the Past Behind by David Zerfoss

     Without realizing it, we often carry something around with us everywhere we go. We bring it out in our conversations, and it shows up in our attitudes. Whatever that thing is from the past may never have really existed, yet its power lives inside us and keeps us from moving forward.

     Listen to people talk throughout the day, and take note of where their conversations are grounded—in the future, in the present, or in the past. Where would you guess most conversations draw from?

     The answer is the past.

Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing!Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?I am making a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland. — Isaiah 43:18–19

     Some of us take our past — and, therefore, stress — with us everywhere we go, towing it along behind us. Why do we do it? It’s familiar to us. It’s that warm and fuzzy bag of stories we like to take out and share with our family, friends, and coworkers. This comfortable past is often our “best friend.” It’s who and what we know best. It’s like a worn-out easy chair or an old pair of shoes that fits us and feels just right. But God commands us, “Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past." (Isaiah 43:18), lest we miss the new thing He is doing right in front of us!

When people talk about or think about their past, it seems to take on the characteristics of a real-life being. The past cannot breathe, talk, think, or do. However, it is immensely powerful and can take over our future—if we let it. It’s like the sirens on the shore, luring you toward the rocks over and over again. Focusing on the past will certainly limit your choices for the future.

Reflect upon your present blessings, of which every man has many; not on your past misfortunes, of which all men have some. — Charles Dickens

For a lot of people, I know the past holds a difficult childhood, an abusive marriage, or a financially draining job loss. Yet no matter how painful our past may have been, for some strange reason we often choose not to let go. In order to get on with our future and simplify our lives, we must choose to make a clean break and leave the past behind.

There’s an engaging Peanuts cartoon where Lucy is apologizing to Charlie Brown for missing a fly ball during a baseball game. She’s sorry she missed the fly ball and says it’s because she started remembering all the others she missed. “The past got in my eyes,” she says.

     Many of us know people who are very reasonable—they have very good reasons for why they can’t move forward in life. Take for instance a person who has endured multiple bad relationships or marriages. He is certain that because of these relationships, he’s stuck in the terrible spot he’s in today. Isn’t it difficult to watch that person once again become attracted to the same type of person with whom he just ended a contentious relationship?

I’ve got my faults, but living in the past is not one of them. There’s no future in it. — Sparky Anderson, Major League Baseball Manager

     Carrying the past forward to the future will provide us with only one thing—incremental change—in our lives. “Unreasonable” people make a choice to create transformational breakthroughs, without “reasonable” ties to the past.

Each of us has a powerful choice. We have the ability to create our own simplified future by starting with a blank sheet of paper and a heart surrendered to God’s will for our lives.

We must always obey the mandate — 'onward, onward, onward.' — Charles Spurgeon

Choose to leave the past behind, and begin living a life filled with new possibilities!

This is something I read the other day, and it really stood out to me. I feel like without realizing it, I can often hold onto the past -- the bad and the good. However, God calls us to "forget the former things" because he is always doing something new!

back to the roots

Observations:

1. Whenever I take a shower at someone's house, I only seem to find small towels. Maybe it's to save space?
2. It frustrates me how the fitting rooms don't have mirrors on the inside. You have to go out and look at the mirror in front of the door. So I don't know how what I tried on looks until I go outside where there are people waiting for me.
3. The driving is pretty crazy. People go through red lights. Oh, I just realized they don't have stop signs! Or maybe they do and I don't recognize it because it's not an octagon with "STOP" on it. Most of the cars I've been in have a GPS installed in them and most of the drivers park backwards rather than forwards because there's not much space.
4. Light switches for the bathroom are always on the outside of the bathroom. I was wondering why this was so, but I realized it's probably for safety reasons.
5. People really like to hold your hand...which makes me uncomfortable when they don't let go after a long time.
6. Some parts of Korea really reminds me of Mexico. I think Korea reminds me more of Mexico than America. 

Sceneries like this remind me of Mexico! All these mountains. 

I spent majority of my fourth week in Korea in JeonJu and Namwon, the southern parts of Korea. It was good going back to my mom's roots, seeing the places she grew up decades ago. It's hard to imagine my parents as kids living in Korea! They probably never imagined living the rest of their life in the US when it was hard for them to just go to college.

I had a lot of time last week so I read a novel titled Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close which I enjoyed. It's been a while since I read a novel on my own.

And here are some pictures...

The farming place where they grow watermelons, melons, tomatoes, and peppers. The fruits taste  really good!

Melons

Look at the intricate details of God's creation.

Next to all the peppers.

2nd aunt, 1st aunt, me, my cousin (who's the same age as my mom)

2nd aunt, 1st aunt, me, cousin's wife

I really like this picture of them!

My mom's elementary school.

They used to have class outside when it was too hot inside.

I felt such like a tourist. Gwang-hal-lu in Namwon.

The family I stayed with! The one in the middle (my cousin's daughter...what does that make her in relation to me?) is coming to America with me.